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Always with You
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Gloria Hunniford;
2008-09-18;
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Usually dispatched within 1-2 business days
*Best price found from Amazon Marketplace seller
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*Amazon: £6.99
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 Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum.
some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time.
Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity.
An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'.
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum.
some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time.
Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity.
An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'.
good book, 17 Oct 2008
I was given this after my dad died i read it to my children it helped i have since given it to two sets of children and i think it helped them a little. I think it is a great book
Pond Life, 23 Apr 2008
The pamphlet is well written and illustrated. Good for sharing with a young child. However, it was not very useful to me. The analogy is misleading and obviously based on an 'afterlife'. May appeal to some but not for those looking for a more straightforward, rational approach.
A lovely story, and a very useful analogy., 18 Mar 2007
I'm reading this book to my 4-year old who's asking where Granddad has gone. It's a particularly useful analogy because of the 2 different environments lived in by the water bugs and the dragonfly, which explains why we can't go to see if Granddad is OK and neither can he come back to see us! It is a bit religious, but if you're OK with that, it's a great story.
WATER BUGS AND DROGNFLIES, 10 Sep 2003
This book tells a sweet story of a water bug who leaves his old life behind to become a dragonfly in his new life. I did feel the story would only appeal to under 5-6 year olds as the story was fictional and did not give the reality of death. Beautifully illustrated, a lovely prayer at the end of the book with the option to put the name of the deceased in. This book would make a nice keepsake for a child to remember the loved one that died.
Only helpful to VERY young kids with Christian beliefs., 05 Feb 2002
I found this very religious. The reading level was focused at VERY young children, but it was not appropriate to read the whole book to the child in my case as the Christian leaning of the end of the book was too strong for my liking. It was a bit of a waste of money!
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum. some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time. Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity. An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'. good book, 17 Oct 2008
I was given this after my dad died i read it to my children it helped i have since given it to two sets of children and i think it helped them a little. I think it is a great book Pond Life, 23 Apr 2008
The pamphlet is well written and illustrated. Good for sharing with a young child. However, it was not very useful to me. The analogy is misleading and obviously based on an 'afterlife'. May appeal to some but not for those looking for a more straightforward, rational approach. A lovely story, and a very useful analogy., 18 Mar 2007
I'm reading this book to my 4-year old who's asking where Granddad has gone. It's a particularly useful analogy because of the 2 different environments lived in by the water bugs and the dragonfly, which explains why we can't go to see if Granddad is OK and neither can he come back to see us! It is a bit religious, but if you're OK with that, it's a great story. WATER BUGS AND DROGNFLIES, 10 Sep 2003
This book tells a sweet story of a water bug who leaves his old life behind to become a dragonfly in his new life. I did feel the story would only appeal to under 5-6 year olds as the story was fictional and did not give the reality of death. Beautifully illustrated, a lovely prayer at the end of the book with the option to put the name of the deceased in. This book would make a nice keepsake for a child to remember the loved one that died. Only helpful to VERY young kids with Christian beliefs., 05 Feb 2002
I found this very religious. The reading level was focused at VERY young children, but it was not appropriate to read the whole book to the child in my case as the Christian leaning of the end of the book was too strong for my liking. It was a bit of a waste of money! On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, 17 Mar 2008
EXCELLENT BOOK. This is essential reading for all of us you have/will lose a loved one - grief is such a personal thing, but this books shows the common demoninators, a book to be read and reread during a time of grieving - cannot recommend highly enough. I have given this book as gifts to grieving friends and they could not believe it when they read in print how they were feeling. In fact this book should be read by everyong on the planet - it will equip us better and help us find the way, not only for ourselves but for whose who may need our support in their dark time of grieving. Dealing with a difficult human experience with the sensitive touch..., 16 Jan 2008
I have read a number of books now by Elisabeth K.R. and this one, rather appropriately, was edited after she passed away by co-author David Kessler.
The book is set out in easy to understand chapters and deals with each of the Five Stages using real-life examples to help clarify each one.
I think this book would be extremely helpful and "a beacon of light" for anybody who is grieving over the loss of a loved one, anybody who is finding it hard to find the right words, or for anybody wanting to expand their emotional person-centred counseling/listening skills, as it not only teaches you the theory, it also teaches you to feel. Five stars are not enough..., 30 Apr 2006
Written in the second person, On Grief And Grieving offers a deeply personal insight into the individual world of grief while reaching out to touch every reader who has ever been bereaved, or struggled for words to offer a friend.
This book addresses both the practical and emotional elements of bereavement, including complicated grieving and taboos. It gives implicit guidance to the professional working with bereavement through its refreshingly un-academic, personal style. Being the final word on the misunderstood Five Stages, it is a crucial textbook for counselling students and volunteers.
EKR and DK share their own pain and support you tenderly through yours. Written as Elisabeth was dying, this book has a special poignant personal involvement from both authors. They explain and accept every thought, emotion and difficulty you may experience, with the loving warmth to support you. They will guide you tenderly through emotions you have not yet named and help you find the healing tears you thought you had already cried. This book is essential reading for all those who have loved and lost.
It should be sold with a box of tissues. EXCELLENT MUDDLE-THROUGH COMPANION, 11 Oct 2005
At times of great grief, when it seems difficult to come up with the right things to say to the grieving, one hopes to run into a companion, a book, anything, that shares the experience of people who have gone through similar experiences before and emerged in one piece. Much to one's dismay, one finds a whole parade of grief counseling peddlers. Garden variety touchy-feely advice. Precious little for people with brain cells in the right places. That is what makes this Kubler-Ross compilation an absolute treasure of a find. It is intelligent in its narrative of moments one goes through at times of deep sudden loss, and the kinds of things one can do or think to ride the emotional rollercoasters that inevitably ensue. The prose is sane, easy to identity with. There is a rich cornucopia of examples and real life experiences that go to great lengths to cushion the self-doubt one could quite easily feel while indulging in a book on the subject. I cannot recommend this muddle-through read highly enough. A smart, sensitive companion. Look for the paperback if possible, there is one. As you are reading this review, may I also offer to point out that life's curveballs may appear random at times, with very little explanations offered for unpleasant things one has to live through, but life goes on. You will get through it. Best wishes.
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum. some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time. Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity. An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'. good book, 17 Oct 2008
I was given this after my dad died i read it to my children it helped i have since given it to two sets of children and i think it helped them a little. I think it is a great book Pond Life, 23 Apr 2008
The pamphlet is well written and illustrated. Good for sharing with a young child. However, it was not very useful to me. The analogy is misleading and obviously based on an 'afterlife'. May appeal to some but not for those looking for a more straightforward, rational approach. A lovely story, and a very useful analogy., 18 Mar 2007
I'm reading this book to my 4-year old who's asking where Granddad has gone. It's a particularly useful analogy because of the 2 different environments lived in by the water bugs and the dragonfly, which explains why we can't go to see if Granddad is OK and neither can he come back to see us! It is a bit religious, but if you're OK with that, it's a great story. WATER BUGS AND DROGNFLIES, 10 Sep 2003
This book tells a sweet story of a water bug who leaves his old life behind to become a dragonfly in his new life. I did feel the story would only appeal to under 5-6 year olds as the story was fictional and did not give the reality of death. Beautifully illustrated, a lovely prayer at the end of the book with the option to put the name of the deceased in. This book would make a nice keepsake for a child to remember the loved one that died. Only helpful to VERY young kids with Christian beliefs., 05 Feb 2002
I found this very religious. The reading level was focused at VERY young children, but it was not appropriate to read the whole book to the child in my case as the Christian leaning of the end of the book was too strong for my liking. It was a bit of a waste of money! On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, 17 Mar 2008
EXCELLENT BOOK. This is essential reading for all of us you have/will lose a loved one - grief is such a personal thing, but this books shows the common demoninators, a book to be read and reread during a time of grieving - cannot recommend highly enough. I have given this book as gifts to grieving friends and they could not believe it when they read in print how they were feeling. In fact this book should be read by everyong on the planet - it will equip us better and help us find the way, not only for ourselves but for whose who may need our support in their dark time of grieving. Dealing with a difficult human experience with the sensitive touch..., 16 Jan 2008
I have read a number of books now by Elisabeth K.R. and this one, rather appropriately, was edited after she passed away by co-author David Kessler.
The book is set out in easy to understand chapters and deals with each of the Five Stages using real-life examples to help clarify each one.
I think this book would be extremely helpful and "a beacon of light" for anybody who is grieving over the loss of a loved one, anybody who is finding it hard to find the right words, or for anybody wanting to expand their emotional person-centred counseling/listening skills, as it not only teaches you the theory, it also teaches you to feel. Five stars are not enough..., 30 Apr 2006
Written in the second person, On Grief And Grieving offers a deeply personal insight into the individual world of grief while reaching out to touch every reader who has ever been bereaved, or struggled for words to offer a friend.
This book addresses both the practical and emotional elements of bereavement, including complicated grieving and taboos. It gives implicit guidance to the professional working with bereavement through its refreshingly un-academic, personal style. Being the final word on the misunderstood Five Stages, it is a crucial textbook for counselling students and volunteers.
EKR and DK share their own pain and support you tenderly through yours. Written as Elisabeth was dying, this book has a special poignant personal involvement from both authors. They explain and accept every thought, emotion and difficulty you may experience, with the loving warmth to support you. They will guide you tenderly through emotions you have not yet named and help you find the healing tears you thought you had already cried. This book is essential reading for all those who have loved and lost.
It should be sold with a box of tissues. EXCELLENT MUDDLE-THROUGH COMPANION, 11 Oct 2005
At times of great grief, when it seems difficult to come up with the right things to say to the grieving, one hopes to run into a companion, a book, anything, that shares the experience of people who have gone through similar experiences before and emerged in one piece. Much to one's dismay, one finds a whole parade of grief counseling peddlers. Garden variety touchy-feely advice. Precious little for people with brain cells in the right places. That is what makes this Kubler-Ross compilation an absolute treasure of a find. It is intelligent in its narrative of moments one goes through at times of deep sudden loss, and the kinds of things one can do or think to ride the emotional rollercoasters that inevitably ensue. The prose is sane, easy to identity with. There is a rich cornucopia of examples and real life experiences that go to great lengths to cushion the self-doubt one could quite easily feel while indulging in a book on the subject. I cannot recommend this muddle-through read highly enough. A smart, sensitive companion. Look for the paperback if possible, there is one. As you are reading this review, may I also offer to point out that life's curveballs may appear random at times, with very little explanations offered for unpleasant things one has to live through, but life goes on. You will get through it. Best wishes.
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Death of a Loved One by Brook Noel, 22 Nov 2007
This book uplifted me. It made me understand the impact of my bereavement better and provided pathways through this grief. I feel better equipped now after having read this book and its many useful tips on how to manage. I wholeheartedly recommend it to someone dealing with the loss of a loved one
I wasn't ready to say goodbye: surviving, coping and healing after the death of a loved one, 26 Sep 2006
This is an excellent book for anyone coping with the sudden death of a loved one or supporting someone with is coping with sudden death of a loved one. It even has 2 pages that the authors have advised you to photocopy and give to family and friends to advise them on how to support you. Both authors have experienced the sudden death of a loved one themselves and tell their own story and those of others. It gives advice on how to overcome those moments when your mind is replaying the events over and over again. It covers all relationships, friends, partners, parents, siblings,friends and unconventional relationships. It gives you advice on how to move your grief forward. I only wish I had known of this book earlier.
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum. some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time. Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity. An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'. good book, 17 Oct 2008
I was given this after my dad died i read it to my children it helped i have since given it to two sets of children and i think it helped them a little. I think it is a great book Pond Life, 23 Apr 2008
The pamphlet is well written and illustrated. Good for sharing with a young child. However, it was not very useful to me. The analogy is misleading and obviously based on an 'afterlife'. May appeal to some but not for those looking for a more straightforward, rational approach. A lovely story, and a very useful analogy., 18 Mar 2007
I'm reading this book to my 4-year old who's asking where Granddad has gone. It's a particularly useful analogy because of the 2 different environments lived in by the water bugs and the dragonfly, which explains why we can't go to see if Granddad is OK and neither can he come back to see us! It is a bit religious, but if you're OK with that, it's a great story. WATER BUGS AND DROGNFLIES, 10 Sep 2003
This book tells a sweet story of a water bug who leaves his old life behind to become a dragonfly in his new life. I did feel the story would only appeal to under 5-6 year olds as the story was fictional and did not give the reality of death. Beautifully illustrated, a lovely prayer at the end of the book with the option to put the name of the deceased in. This book would make a nice keepsake for a child to remember the loved one that died. Only helpful to VERY young kids with Christian beliefs., 05 Feb 2002
I found this very religious. The reading level was focused at VERY young children, but it was not appropriate to read the whole book to the child in my case as the Christian leaning of the end of the book was too strong for my liking. It was a bit of a waste of money! On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, 17 Mar 2008
EXCELLENT BOOK. This is essential reading for all of us you have/will lose a loved one - grief is such a personal thing, but this books shows the common demoninators, a book to be read and reread during a time of grieving - cannot recommend highly enough. I have given this book as gifts to grieving friends and they could not believe it when they read in print how they were feeling. In fact this book should be read by everyong on the planet - it will equip us better and help us find the way, not only for ourselves but for whose who may need our support in their dark time of grieving. Dealing with a difficult human experience with the sensitive touch..., 16 Jan 2008
I have read a number of books now by Elisabeth K.R. and this one, rather appropriately, was edited after she passed away by co-author David Kessler.
The book is set out in easy to understand chapters and deals with each of the Five Stages using real-life examples to help clarify each one.
I think this book would be extremely helpful and "a beacon of light" for anybody who is grieving over the loss of a loved one, anybody who is finding it hard to find the right words, or for anybody wanting to expand their emotional person-centred counseling/listening skills, as it not only teaches you the theory, it also teaches you to feel. Five stars are not enough..., 30 Apr 2006
Written in the second person, On Grief And Grieving offers a deeply personal insight into the individual world of grief while reaching out to touch every reader who has ever been bereaved, or struggled for words to offer a friend.
This book addresses both the practical and emotional elements of bereavement, including complicated grieving and taboos. It gives implicit guidance to the professional working with bereavement through its refreshingly un-academic, personal style. Being the final word on the misunderstood Five Stages, it is a crucial textbook for counselling students and volunteers.
EKR and DK share their own pain and support you tenderly through yours. Written as Elisabeth was dying, this book has a special poignant personal involvement from both authors. They explain and accept every thought, emotion and difficulty you may experience, with the loving warmth to support you. They will guide you tenderly through emotions you have not yet named and help you find the healing tears you thought you had already cried. This book is essential reading for all those who have loved and lost.
It should be sold with a box of tissues. EXCELLENT MUDDLE-THROUGH COMPANION, 11 Oct 2005
At times of great grief, when it seems difficult to come up with the right things to say to the grieving, one hopes to run into a companion, a book, anything, that shares the experience of people who have gone through similar experiences before and emerged in one piece. Much to one's dismay, one finds a whole parade of grief counseling peddlers. Garden variety touchy-feely advice. Precious little for people with brain cells in the right places. That is what makes this Kubler-Ross compilation an absolute treasure of a find. It is intelligent in its narrative of moments one goes through at times of deep sudden loss, and the kinds of things one can do or think to ride the emotional rollercoasters that inevitably ensue. The prose is sane, easy to identity with. There is a rich cornucopia of examples and real life experiences that go to great lengths to cushion the self-doubt one could quite easily feel while indulging in a book on the subject. I cannot recommend this muddle-through read highly enough. A smart, sensitive companion. Look for the paperback if possible, there is one. As you are reading this review, may I also offer to point out that life's curveballs may appear random at times, with very little explanations offered for unpleasant things one has to live through, but life goes on. You will get through it. Best wishes.
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Death of a Loved One by Brook Noel, 22 Nov 2007
This book uplifted me. It made me understand the impact of my bereavement better and provided pathways through this grief. I feel better equipped now after having read this book and its many useful tips on how to manage. I wholeheartedly recommend it to someone dealing with the loss of a loved one
I wasn't ready to say goodbye: surviving, coping and healing after the death of a loved one, 26 Sep 2006
This is an excellent book for anyone coping with the sudden death of a loved one or supporting someone with is coping with sudden death of a loved one. It even has 2 pages that the authors have advised you to photocopy and give to family and friends to advise them on how to support you. Both authors have experienced the sudden death of a loved one themselves and tell their own story and those of others. It gives advice on how to overcome those moments when your mind is replaying the events over and over again. It covers all relationships, friends, partners, parents, siblings,friends and unconventional relationships. It gives you advice on how to move your grief forward. I only wish I had known of this book earlier.
FANTASTICALLY REAL!, 11 Oct 2008
YOU'LL GET OVER IT by VIRGINIA IRONSIDE
I was recommended this book and it didn't disappoint. I was impressed by the author's down to earth realness and occasionally brutal honesty. Instead of offering platitudes and ways to come to terms with grief and listing the stages one should be passing through in order to "grieve in the proper manner", I really warmed to the reality of her words that there is no correct procedure. That it is a horrible experience and we will all react to it in different ways. I valued the way she she challenged the belief that if the bereaved did not cry he was in denial, or that if steps 2 and 3 weren't followed then the process would be interrupted etc etc. Her scorn for counsellors and age old theories about death and bereavement were very evident and I read with respect and amusement relishing her irreverent and sarcastic wit. But ultimately with a sense of knowing that she was right. At last someone who has the balls to tell it like it is.
I actually found myself laughing out loud on several occasions whilst reading this. The author has a very comical turn of phrase that refuses to let the book succumb to any maudlin sentimentality, yet at the same time there were some achingly poignant quotes from people who talked about their own experiences and pain. I found they were all the more powerful because of their simplicity.
I also found the book deeply comforting as several little niggles about my own behaviour when my mother and grandparents died were addressed by others who acted in a similar way to myself. I felt liberated to realise that I was normal and it was just a part of the process.
Lastly the book was invaluable to me as a guide on what not to say to a bereaved person, as there is a chapter devoted to the annoying and trite things that people tend to say to those who have suffered a bereavement. Several people have contributed their experiences and feelings about the well meant but insensitive things that so readily trip off the tongue at this time. Although the author does also say that at this time it is very likely that they will take offence very easily and it is hard to not say something that will annoy, but it is not personal, the anger is just misdirected at times.
I have been waiting for a book like this for years. I admire anyone who can share something so deeply personal as her own grief and who has the courage to say how it really was for her, warts and all. By writing this book, I fel she has really given everyone who reads it a great gift. That it's ok to do it your way.
I would recommend this book to anyone who is or has been bereaved. I personally feel it is more explanatory, real and helpful than most of the impersonal, patronising tosh most writers on the subject turn out.
Rollercoaster emotions of bereavement, 01 Oct 2007
This book has helped me through the shock and emotions I have experienced following 2 sudden deaths of very close people this year. Virginia doesn't address the sudden death aspect very much, but her straight talking approach cuts through other books on bereavement. By dipping into her book - after you have read it cover to cover - offers some comfort when feeling down as the chapters cover most of the emotions felt when a loved (or not) one dies. She does not assume that the person who has died was a dearly beloved and that alone makes it all the more readable! It is a true & honest friend and can be relied upon to guide you through whatever you feel at that moment.
The best book on this subject to date., 20 Jul 2005
Profoundly helpful at a complex and dreadful time.
The best book I've read so far on bereavement, 21 Mar 2005
Not an easy read! Don't be put off by Virginia Ironside's somewhat aggressive manner at times, there are a lot of gems to be found in this book. If you are grieving for a husband/wife/parnter/parent or child then this is the book for you. Virginia Ironside takes grief by it's ankles and shakes it hard until all the "loose change" - the negative thoughts, the guilty thoughts, the "hidden" depths of grief - spill out onto the ground. She then examines each aspect in the cold light of day. Not a sentimental or slushy book, and not one that adheres to the old adage "you'll get over it!"
An honest and comforting story about grief., 10 Apr 2002
A truely excellent account of grief,quite frank and beautifully honest,which I personally found refreshing and needed.
The title 'You'll get over it'sums the book up.Will you ever get over someone you truely loved so much?People think they are being a comfort whilst saying this,Virginia picks up well on this and uses appropriate sarcasm.
I lost my dad at the begginig of the year(2002).
This book has guided me through all the emotions I have been feeling,almost mirroring my own thoughts and feelings.
I feel this is a definate for the bereaved as it makes you realise that what you feel isn't 'mad' or 'foolish' it is grief.
Thankyou Virginia.
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum. some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time. Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity. An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'. good book, 17 Oct 2008
I was given this after my dad died i read it to my children it helped i have since given it to two sets of children and i think it helped them a little. I think it is a great book Pond Life, 23 Apr 2008
The pamphlet is well written and illustrated. Good for sharing with a young child. However, it was not very useful to me. The analogy is misleading and obviously based on an 'afterlife'. May appeal to some but not for those looking for a more straightforward, rational approach. A lovely story, and a very useful analogy., 18 Mar 2007
I'm reading this book to my 4-year old who's asking where Granddad has gone. It's a particularly useful analogy because of the 2 different environments lived in by the water bugs and the dragonfly, which explains why we can't go to see if Granddad is OK and neither can he come back to see us! It is a bit religious, but if you're OK with that, it's a great story. WATER BUGS AND DROGNFLIES, 10 Sep 2003
This book tells a sweet story of a water bug who leaves his old life behind to become a dragonfly in his new life. I did feel the story would only appeal to under 5-6 year olds as the story was fictional and did not give the reality of death. Beautifully illustrated, a lovely prayer at the end of the book with the option to put the name of the deceased in. This book would make a nice keepsake for a child to remember the loved one that died. Only helpful to VERY young kids with Christian beliefs., 05 Feb 2002
I found this very religious. The reading level was focused at VERY young children, but it was not appropriate to read the whole book to the child in my case as the Christian leaning of the end of the book was too strong for my liking. It was a bit of a waste of money! On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, 17 Mar 2008
EXCELLENT BOOK. This is essential reading for all of us you have/will lose a loved one - grief is such a personal thing, but this books shows the common demoninators, a book to be read and reread during a time of grieving - cannot recommend highly enough. I have given this book as gifts to grieving friends and they could not believe it when they read in print how they were feeling. In fact this book should be read by everyong on the planet - it will equip us better and help us find the way, not only for ourselves but for whose who may need our support in their dark time of grieving. Dealing with a difficult human experience with the sensitive touch..., 16 Jan 2008
I have read a number of books now by Elisabeth K.R. and this one, rather appropriately, was edited after she passed away by co-author David Kessler.
The book is set out in easy to understand chapters and deals with each of the Five Stages using real-life examples to help clarify each one.
I think this book would be extremely helpful and "a beacon of light" for anybody who is grieving over the loss of a loved one, anybody who is finding it hard to find the right words, or for anybody wanting to expand their emotional person-centred counseling/listening skills, as it not only teaches you the theory, it also teaches you to feel. Five stars are not enough..., 30 Apr 2006
Written in the second person, On Grief And Grieving offers a deeply personal insight into the individual world of grief while reaching out to touch every reader who has ever been bereaved, or struggled for words to offer a friend.
This book addresses both the practical and emotional elements of bereavement, including complicated grieving and taboos. It gives implicit guidance to the professional working with bereavement through its refreshingly un-academic, personal style. Being the final word on the misunderstood Five Stages, it is a crucial textbook for counselling students and volunteers.
EKR and DK share their own pain and support you tenderly through yours. Written as Elisabeth was dying, this book has a special poignant personal involvement from both authors. They explain and accept every thought, emotion and difficulty you may experience, with the loving warmth to support you. They will guide you tenderly through emotions you have not yet named and help you find the healing tears you thought you had already cried. This book is essential reading for all those who have loved and lost.
It should be sold with a box of tissues. EXCELLENT MUDDLE-THROUGH COMPANION, 11 Oct 2005
At times of great grief, when it seems difficult to come up with the right things to say to the grieving, one hopes to run into a companion, a book, anything, that shares the experience of people who have gone through similar experiences before and emerged in one piece. Much to one's dismay, one finds a whole parade of grief counseling peddlers. Garden variety touchy-feely advice. Precious little for people with brain cells in the right places. That is what makes this Kubler-Ross compilation an absolute treasure of a find. It is intelligent in its narrative of moments one goes through at times of deep sudden loss, and the kinds of things one can do or think to ride the emotional rollercoasters that inevitably ensue. The prose is sane, easy to identity with. There is a rich cornucopia of examples and real life experiences that go to great lengths to cushion the self-doubt one could quite easily feel while indulging in a book on the subject. I cannot recommend this muddle-through read highly enough. A smart, sensitive companion. Look for the paperback if possible, there is one. As you are reading this review, may I also offer to point out that life's curveballs may appear random at times, with very little explanations offered for unpleasant things one has to live through, but life goes on. You will get through it. Best wishes.
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Death of a Loved One by Brook Noel, 22 Nov 2007
This book uplifted me. It made me understand the impact of my bereavement better and provided pathways through this grief. I feel better equipped now after having read this book and its many useful tips on how to manage. I wholeheartedly recommend it to someone dealing with the loss of a loved one
I wasn't ready to say goodbye: surviving, coping and healing after the death of a loved one, 26 Sep 2006
This is an excellent book for anyone coping with the sudden death of a loved one or supporting someone with is coping with sudden death of a loved one. It even has 2 pages that the authors have advised you to photocopy and give to family and friends to advise them on how to support you. Both authors have experienced the sudden death of a loved one themselves and tell their own story and those of others. It gives advice on how to overcome those moments when your mind is replaying the events over and over again. It covers all relationships, friends, partners, parents, siblings,friends and unconventional relationships. It gives you advice on how to move your grief forward. I only wish I had known of this book earlier.
FANTASTICALLY REAL!, 11 Oct 2008
YOU'LL GET OVER IT by VIRGINIA IRONSIDE
I was recommended this book and it didn't disappoint. I was impressed by the author's down to earth realness and occasionally brutal honesty. Instead of offering platitudes and ways to come to terms with grief and listing the stages one should be passing through in order to "grieve in the proper manner", I really warmed to the reality of her words that there is no correct procedure. That it is a horrible experience and we will all react to it in different ways. I valued the way she she challenged the belief that if the bereaved did not cry he was in denial, or that if steps 2 and 3 weren't followed then the process would be interrupted etc etc. Her scorn for counsellors and age old theories about death and bereavement were very evident and I read with respect and amusement relishing her irreverent and sarcastic wit. But ultimately with a sense of knowing that she was right. At last someone who has the balls to tell it like it is.
I actually found myself laughing out loud on several occasions whilst reading this. The author has a very comical turn of phrase that refuses to let the book succumb to any maudlin sentimentality, yet at the same time there were some achingly poignant quotes from people who talked about their own experiences and pain. I found they were all the more powerful because of their simplicity.
I also found the book deeply comforting as several little niggles about my own behaviour when my mother and grandparents died were addressed by others who acted in a similar way to myself. I felt liberated to realise that I was normal and it was just a part of the process.
Lastly the book was invaluable to me as a guide on what not to say to a bereaved person, as there is a chapter devoted to the annoying and trite things that people tend to say to those who have suffered a bereavement. Several people have contributed their experiences and feelings about the well meant but insensitive things that so readily trip off the tongue at this time. Although the author does also say that at this time it is very likely that they will take offence very easily and it is hard to not say something that will annoy, but it is not personal, the anger is just misdirected at times.
I have been waiting for a book like this for years. I admire anyone who can share something so deeply personal as her own grief and who has the courage to say how it really was for her, warts and all. By writing this book, I fel she has really given everyone who reads it a great gift. That it's ok to do it your way.
I would recommend this book to anyone who is or has been bereaved. I personally feel it is more explanatory, real and helpful than most of the impersonal, patronising tosh most writers on the subject turn out.
Rollercoaster emotions of bereavement, 01 Oct 2007
This book has helped me through the shock and emotions I have experienced following 2 sudden deaths of very close people this year. Virginia doesn't address the sudden death aspect very much, but her straight talking approach cuts through other books on bereavement. By dipping into her book - after you have read it cover to cover - offers some comfort when feeling down as the chapters cover most of the emotions felt when a loved (or not) one dies. She does not assume that the person who has died was a dearly beloved and that alone makes it all the more readable! It is a true & honest friend and can be relied upon to guide you through whatever you feel at that moment.
The best book on this subject to date., 20 Jul 2005
Profoundly helpful at a complex and dreadful time.
The best book I've read so far on bereavement, 21 Mar 2005
Not an easy read! Don't be put off by Virginia Ironside's somewhat aggressive manner at times, there are a lot of gems to be found in this book. If you are grieving for a husband/wife/parnter/parent or child then this is the book for you. Virginia Ironside takes grief by it's ankles and shakes it hard until all the "loose change" - the negative thoughts, the guilty thoughts, the "hidden" depths of grief - spill out onto the ground. She then examines each aspect in the cold light of day. Not a sentimental or slushy book, and not one that adheres to the old adage "you'll get over it!"
An honest and comforting story about grief., 10 Apr 2002
A truely excellent account of grief,quite frank and beautifully honest,which I personally found refreshing and needed.
The title 'You'll get over it'sums the book up.Will you ever get over someone you truely loved so much?People think they are being a comfort whilst saying this,Virginia picks up well on this and uses appropriate sarcasm.
I lost my dad at the begginig of the year(2002).
This book has guided me through all the emotions I have been feeling,almost mirroring my own thoughts and feelings.
I feel this is a definate for the bereaved as it makes you realise that what you feel isn't 'mad' or 'foolish' it is grief.
Thankyou Virginia.
Not very exciting!, 10 Oct 2005
Although this book presents a number of research findings about grief and is a classic text in the area of bereavement the writing style is dry and not hugely inspiring.
Even in grief there is a pattern, 05 Mar 2002
We never expect the ones we love to ever leave us. But if they do with support from friends and family we can make it through.
This book shows that even in the dragedy of grief there is a pattern.
We are not alone, not the only ones, many people have been here before. No great jargon here - just some straight talking. Some help to work out where you are at - that you are not going mad - that grief has stages we must go through and work hard to go forward.
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum. some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time. Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity. An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria Hunniford's first book "Next To You" I sent a letter to Gloria saying how amazing the book was, and how the same feelings she had felt losing her daughter, were very similar to the ones I had felt when I lost my dad 5 years ago when I was only 20. After I sent that letter I thought nothing more of it, until I received a letter back a month ago saying Gloria wanted to include part of that letter in this new book. I was very touched and very proud to have my letter included in the book out of over 12,000 letters Gloria received. My dad always dreamt he would be in a book, and from the inspiring words he gave me when he was battling prostate cancer, I have made it a reality. Look out for the letter from "Liam".
Anyway I read this book very quickly, and found it just as good as the first one. This time though it has many of the letters and stories from the people that took the time to write into Gloria and share their own feelings, and show Gloria that she was not going through something on her own. The book details how Gloria began to continue with her life after losing her daughter. The days when you don't want to continue life, but you have to. Grief is a disease and one that you don't fully get over, but learn to live with and this book shows that. You never stop thinking about the person that you lost, but you begin to live some sort of semi normal life.
Anyone who has lost someone dear to them will find this book a comfort, and show that even when you get the most silly feelings,many others will have felt EXACTLY the same. I hope my words in the book help many others going through grief. A book that will make you cry for certain, but will also help and give you the strength to try and rebuild your life.
Life can throw the worst of the worst at you, but this book shows that even then you can still laugh once again when you never thought you could.
a great read that you wont be able to put down, 21 Sep 2008
as i read the first book 'next to you' i felt i had to read this book and i found it very moving and was a great read. it took me 24 hours to read this book from cover to cover and i recommend it to anybody who has read 'next to you'. good book, 17 Oct 2008
I was given this after my dad died i read it to my children it helped i have since given it to two sets of children and i think it helped them a little. I think it is a great book Pond Life, 23 Apr 2008
The pamphlet is well written and illustrated. Good for sharing with a young child. However, it was not very useful to me. The analogy is misleading and obviously based on an 'afterlife'. May appeal to some but not for those looking for a more straightforward, rational approach. A lovely story, and a very useful analogy., 18 Mar 2007
I'm reading this book to my 4-year old who's asking where Granddad has gone. It's a particularly useful analogy because of the 2 different environments lived in by the water bugs and the dragonfly, which explains why we can't go to see if Granddad is OK and neither can he come back to see us! It is a bit religious, but if you're OK with that, it's a great story. WATER BUGS AND DROGNFLIES, 10 Sep 2003
This book tells a sweet story of a water bug who leaves his old life behind to become a dragonfly in his new life. I did feel the story would only appeal to under 5-6 year olds as the story was fictional and did not give the reality of death. Beautifully illustrated, a lovely prayer at the end of the book with the option to put the name of the deceased in. This book would make a nice keepsake for a child to remember the loved one that died. Only helpful to VERY young kids with Christian beliefs., 05 Feb 2002
I found this very religious. The reading level was focused at VERY young children, but it was not appropriate to read the whole book to the child in my case as the Christian leaning of the end of the book was too strong for my liking. It was a bit of a waste of money! On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, 17 Mar 2008
EXCELLENT BOOK. This is essential reading for all of us you have/will lose a loved one - grief is such a personal thing, but this books shows the common demoninators, a book to be read and reread during a time of grieving - cannot recommend highly enough. I have given this book as gifts to grieving friends and they could not believe it when they read in print how they were feeling. In fact this book should be read by everyong on the planet - it will equip us better and help us find the way, not only for ourselves but for whose who may need our support in their dark time of grieving. Dealing with a difficult human experience with the sensitive touch..., 16 Jan 2008
I have read a number of books now by Elisabeth K.R. and this one, rather appropriately, was edited after she passed away by co-author David Kessler.
The book is set out in easy to understand chapters and deals with each of the Five Stages using real-life examples to help clarify each one.
I think this book would be extremely helpful and "a beacon of light" for anybody who is grieving over the loss of a loved one, anybody who is finding it hard to find the right words, or for anybody wanting to expand their emotional person-centred counseling/listening skills, as it not only teaches you the theory, it also teaches you to feel. Five stars are not enough..., 30 Apr 2006
Written in the second person, On Grief And Grieving offers a deeply personal insight into the individual world of grief while reaching out to touch every reader who has ever been bereaved, or struggled for words to offer a friend.
This book addresses both the practical and emotional elements of bereavement, including complicated grieving and taboos. It gives implicit guidance to the professional working with bereavement through its refreshingly un-academic, personal style. Being the final word on the misunderstood Five Stages, it is a crucial textbook for counselling students and volunteers.
EKR and DK share their own pain and support you tenderly through yours. Written as Elisabeth was dying, this book has a special poignant personal involvement from both authors. They explain and accept every thought, emotion and difficulty you may experience, with the loving warmth to support you. They will guide you tenderly through emotions you have not yet named and help you find the healing tears you thought you had already cried. This book is essential reading for all those who have loved and lost.
It should be sold with a box of tissues. EXCELLENT MUDDLE-THROUGH COMPANION, 11 Oct 2005
At times of great grief, when it seems difficult to come up with the right things to say to the grieving, one hopes to run into a companion, a book, anything, that shares the experience of people who have gone through similar experiences before and emerged in one piece. Much to one's dismay, one finds a whole parade of grief counseling peddlers. Garden variety touchy-feely advice. Precious little for people with brain cells in the right places. That is what makes this Kubler-Ross compilation an absolute treasure of a find. It is intelligent in its narrative of moments one goes through at times of deep sudden loss, and the kinds of things one can do or think to ride the emotional rollercoasters that inevitably ensue. The prose is sane, easy to identity with. There is a rich cornucopia of examples and real life experiences that go to great lengths to cushion the self-doubt one could quite easily feel while indulging in a book on the subject. I cannot recommend this muddle-through read highly enough. A smart, sensitive companion. Look for the paperback if possible, there is one. As you are reading this review, may I also offer to point out that life's curveballs may appear random at times, with very little explanations offered for unpleasant things one has to live through, but life goes on. You will get through it. Best wishes.
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Death of a Loved One by Brook Noel, 22 Nov 2007
This book uplifted me. It made me understand the impact of my bereavement better and provided pathways through this grief. I feel better equipped now after having read this book and its many useful tips on how to manage. I wholeheartedly recommend it to someone dealing with the loss of a loved one
I wasn't ready to say goodbye: surviving, coping and healing after the death of a loved one, 26 Sep 2006
This is an excellent book for anyone coping with the sudden death of a loved one or supporting someone with is coping with sudden death of a loved one. It even has 2 pages that the authors have advised you to photocopy and give to family and friends to advise them on how to support you. Both authors have experienced the sudden death of a loved one themselves and tell their own story and those of others. It gives advice on how to overcome those moments when your mind is replaying the events over and over again. It covers all relationships, friends, partners, parents, siblings,friends and unconventional relationships. It gives you advice on how to move your grief forward. I only wish I had known of this book earlier.
FANTASTICALLY REAL!, 11 Oct 2008
YOU'LL GET OVER IT by VIRGINIA IRONSIDE
I was recommended this book and it didn't disappoint. I was impressed by the author's down to earth realness and occasionally brutal honesty. Instead of offering platitudes and ways to come to terms with grief and listing the stages one should be passing through in order to "grieve in the proper manner", I really warmed to the reality of her words that there is no correct procedure. That it is a horrible experience and we will all react to it in different ways. I valued the way she she challenged the belief that if the bereaved did not cry he was in denial, or that if steps 2 and 3 weren't followed then the process would be interrupted etc etc. Her scorn for counsellors and age old theories about death and bereavement were very evident and I read with respect and amusement relishing her irreverent and sarcastic wit. But ultimately with a sense of knowing that she was right. At last someone who has the balls to tell it like it is.
I actually found myself laughing out loud on several occasions whilst reading this. The author has a very comical turn of phrase that refuses to let the book succumb to any maudlin sentimentality, yet at the same time there were some achingly poignant quotes from people who talked about their own experiences and pain. I found they were all the more powerful because of their simplicity.
I also found the book deeply comforting as several little niggles about my own behaviour when my mother and grandparents died were addressed by others who acted in a similar way to myself. I felt liberated to realise that I was normal and it was just a part of the process.
Lastly the book was invaluable to me as a guide on what not to say to a bereaved person, as there is a chapter devoted to the annoying and trite things that people tend to say to those who have suffered a bereavement. Several people have contributed their experiences and feelings about the well meant but insensitive things that so readily trip off the tongue at this time. Although the author does also say that at this time it is very likely that they will take offence very easily and it is hard to not say something that will annoy, but it is not personal, the anger is just misdirected at times.
I have been waiting for a book like this for years. I admire anyone who can share something so deeply personal as her own grief and who has the courage to say how it really was for her, warts and all. By writing this book, I fel she has really given everyone who reads it a great gift. That it's ok to do it your way.
I would recommend this book to anyone who is or has been bereaved. I personally feel it is more explanatory, real and helpful than most of the impersonal, patronising tosh most writers on the subject turn out.
Rollercoaster emotions of bereavement, 01 Oct 2007
This book has helped me through the shock and emotions I have experienced following 2 sudden deaths of very close people this year. Virginia doesn't address the sudden death aspect very much, but her straight talking approach cuts through other books on bereavement. By dipping into her book - after you have read it cover to cover - offers some comfort when feeling down as the chapters cover most of the emotions felt when a loved (or not) one dies. She does not assume that the person who has died was a dearly beloved and that alone makes it all the more readable! It is a true & honest friend and can be relied upon to guide you through whatever you feel at that moment.
The best book on this subject to date., 20 Jul 2005
Profoundly helpful at a complex and dreadful time.
The best book I've read so far on bereavement, 21 Mar 2005
Not an easy read! Don't be put off by Virginia Ironside's somewhat aggressive manner at times, there are a lot of gems to be found in this book. If you are grieving for a husband/wife/parnter/parent or child then this is the book for you. Virginia Ironside takes grief by it's ankles and shakes it hard until all the "loose change" - the negative thoughts, the guilty thoughts, the "hidden" depths of grief - spill out onto the ground. She then examines each aspect in the cold light of day. Not a sentimental or slushy book, and not one that adheres to the old adage "you'll get over it!"
An honest and comforting story about grief., 10 Apr 2002
A truely excellent account of grief,quite frank and beautifully honest,which I personally found refreshing and needed.
The title 'You'll get over it'sums the book up.Will you ever get over someone you truely loved so much?People think they are being a comfort whilst saying this,Virginia picks up well on this and uses appropriate sarcasm.
I lost my dad at the begginig of the year(2002).
This book has guided me through all the emotions I have been feeling,almost mirroring my own thoughts and feelings.
I feel this is a definate for the bereaved as it makes you realise that what you feel isn't 'mad' or 'foolish' it is grief.
Thankyou Virginia.
Not very exciting!, 10 Oct 2005
Although this book presents a number of research findings about grief and is a classic text in the area of bereavement the writing style is dry and not hugely inspiring.
Even in grief there is a pattern, 05 Mar 2002
We never expect the ones we love to ever leave us. But if they do with support from friends and family we can make it through.
This book shows that even in the dragedy of grief there is a pattern.
We are not alone, not the only ones, many people have been here before. No great jargon here - just some straight talking. Some help to work out where you are at - that you are not going mad - that grief has stages we must go through and work hard to go forward.
On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, 17 Mar 2008
EXCELLENT BOOK. This is essential reading for all of us you have/will lose a loved one - grief is such a personal thing, but this books shows the common demoninators, a book to be read and reread during a time of grieving - cannot recommend highly enough. I have given this book as gifts to grieving friends and they could not believe it when they read in print how they were feeling. In fact this book should be read by everyong on the planet - it will equip us better and help us find the way, not only for ourselves but for whose who may need our support in their dark time of grieving.
Dealing with a difficult human experience with the sensitive touch..., 16 Jan 2008
I have read a number of books now by Elisabeth K.R. and this one, rather appropriately, was edited after she passed away by co-author David Kessler.
The book is set out in easy to understand chapters and deals with each of the Five Stages using real-life examples to help clarify each one.
I think this book would be extremely helpful and "a beacon of light" for anybody who is grieving over the loss of a loved one, anybody who is finding it hard to find the right words, or for anybody wanting to expand their emotional person-centred counseling/listening skills, as it not only teaches you the theory, it also teaches you to feel.
Five stars are not enough..., 30 Apr 2006
Written in the second person, On Grief And Grieving offers a deeply personal insight into the individual world of grief while reaching out to touch every reader who has ever been bereaved, or struggled for words to offer a friend.
This book addresses both the practical and emotional elements of bereavement, including complicated grieving and taboos. It gives implicit guidance to the professional working with bereavement through its refreshingly un-academic, personal style. Being the final word on the misunderstood Five Stages, it is a crucial textbook for counselling students and volunteers.
EKR and DK share their own pain and support you tenderly through yours. Written as Elisabeth was dying, this book has a special poignant personal involvement from both authors. They explain and accept every thought, emotion and difficulty you may experience, with the loving warmth to support you. They will guide you tenderly through emotions you have not yet named and help you find the healing tears you thought you had already cried. This book is essential reading for all those who have loved and lost.
It should be sold with a box of tissues.
EXCELLENT MUDDLE-THROUGH COMPANION, 11 Oct 2005
At times of great grief, when it seems difficult to come up with the right things to say to the grieving, one hopes to run into a companion, a book, anything, that shares the experience of people who have gone through similar experiences before and emerged in one piece. Much to one's dismay, one finds a whole parade of grief counseling peddlers. Garden variety touchy-feely advice. Precious little for people with brain cells in the right places. That is what makes this Kubler-Ross compilation an absolute treasure of a find. It is intelligent in its narrative of moments one goes through at times of deep sudden loss, and the kinds of things one can do or think to ride the emotional rollercoasters that inevitably ensue. The prose is sane, easy to identity with. There is a rich cornucopia of examples and real life experiences that go to great lengths to cushion the self-doubt one could quite easily feel while indulging in a book on the subject. I cannot recommend this muddle-through read highly enough. A smart, sensitive companion. Look for the paperback if possible, there is one. As you are reading this review, may I also offer to point out that life's curveballs may appear random at times, with very little explanations offered for unpleasant things one has to live through, but life goes on. You will get through it. Best wishes.
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Customer Reviews
Thank you, 10 Oct 2008
My brother was tragically killed 10 weeks ago, when he was only home for 3 days from where he has been working in Austria. He was a passenger in a car when a some timber fell off a van coming in the opposite direction, came through the window and killed him instantly, leaving the driver unhurt.
My Mum had found huge comfort in reading this book by Gloria. It was recommended to her by my sisters health visitor and she has been reading it on and off since the accident. We have struggled to receive any help from bereavement councellers and Mum wanted to be able to know that others feel the way she is feeling. From reading this book, although Caron dies in totally different circumstances, Gloria went through some of the same feelings which Mum is going through now. I want to thank Gloria for publishing such a great book which has been helping Mum throgh the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with in her life.
Its a shame that we have come across this book in such terrible circumstances but praise Gloria for her writing this book after dealing with the grief of losing her own daughter. No one will ever know the pain this involves unless it has happened to them and to all those who think it another money making book, then they are wrong because this has immensly helped my Mum.
some profound and helpful writing, 04 Oct 2008
The obvious focus of the book is on dealing with/coping with the death of a child. My reason for reading it is that my wonderful husband suddenly - although perfectly healthy - dropped dead almost two years ago. Whilst much of the book is directed at bereaved parents I found a lot of it extremely helpful - yes, it provoked tears and yes, I did find the slight feeling that Gloria thinks the death of a child is the worst loss rather hard to take. I would certainly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a bereavement that they are finding hard to come to terms with - it has definitely helped me at a difficult time.
Still with us, 30 Sep 2008
I'm afraid that I don't agree with the earlier reviewers. I, for one, am not happy to see yet another book from Gloria about her daughter. It appears that this is Gloria's new career, writing books about her dead daughter. I might be less harsh if I knew that all the proceeds of these books was being donated to charity.
An Amazing Book Which I Contributed To......., 22 Sep 2008
I was lucky to get this book before it's official release date after having a letter I wrote to Gloria included in this new book.
Off the back of Gloria | | |